Gay Marriage A Step Too Far For Bert and Ernie

There was a time when two men apparently living in the same house would not raise so much as an eyebrow.

Neil Simon took up his pen in the 60's and wrote a play featuring just such a scenario, two men forced by circumstance to "live together". Felix, almost military in his fastidiousness, and Oscar, so laid back a sloven if he were any more laid back he would fall over. "The Odd Couple" made an absolute fortune and at no point did either actor take off any items of clothing - although I recall Felix appearing in a dressing gown in one episode to berate his slovenly flatmate from hell over his leaving hairs in the sink after shaving .....

I lost count of the number of times these two appeared in pyjamas for one of their superbly timed routines, including what I consider the most superbly timed piece of stand-up going, Eric's dance routine with a string of sausages to the accompaniment of "The Stripper". The degree to which the fourth grapefruit ALMOST escaped the meat cleaver spoke eloquently of the fact that there was no "take two" here.

So you can imagine how joyfully I received the news that a bunch of  idiots have demanded that the makers of Sesame Street that programme that teaches your kids how to mispronounce the alphabet (Liza with a Zee My Fragrant Arse) have the sock puppets BERT and ERNIE reveal that their long term friendship is far more than that, and far deeper. Yes the rainbow flagged ones are demanding that Bert and Ernie declare their love for each other and have a Gay Marriage On Screen.

PRESUMABLY this means "Rubber Duckie" here will be called in to play the part of Raggott The Gerbil ?  Well, there's only one word to follow that ....  Armageddon !!

AT THE MOMENT the producers of Sesame Street are sticking to their guns and declaring there is no way Bert and Ernie will be anything other than flatmates and friends. 

Which, in my opinion, is just as well. Until he was sold off to the Japanese and never seen again, Sooty spent the first half of his life suffering Harry Corbett's hand up his arse, and the next enduring Harry's son Matthew taking over where his father left off. But we all knew Sooty couldn't work his magic wand without such foreplay .....

I suppose this whole story could be worse. 

It could be these three the petition was trying to legalise the behaviour of.