Wednesday, 31 October 2007

"Calendar Boys" Firemen face disciplinary action.

What the hell are the people who "manage" our Fire Service thinking ?

Inspired no doubt by the fact that members of the Women's Institute found a whole new use for a cake stand and other domestic utilities that would have caused even Madonna to pause in wonder, a former retained North Wales firefighter and member of a North Wales Male Voice Choir decided it would be a splendid idea to pose without his firefighting kit - or any other kit apart from his wellies and maybe his helmet - for a calendar sold to raise funds for Help The Aged.

Well I don't yet feel the need to approach that worthy charity for assistance but this story makes me feel the urge to pick up the phone and order a copy of the calendar.

Because it seems the chap who bared almost all, relying on the expert use of a high pressure water hose by a colleague to protect him from the censor, would face disciplinary action if he did it again, even though his whole management heirarchy gave the "thumbs-up" for the photoshoot in the first place.

I've got a message for the management of North Wales Fire Service. Get a Life you useless politically-correct lumps of shit. And don't even think about reporting back for work until you can demonstrate that you know the difference between a tosser pissing about in a tumble drier and a man whose public spirited willingness to display a bit of bare faced cheek in a good cause makes him a credit to the service and to the community in general.

Monday, 29 October 2007

Would You Fly To The USA with this man ?


It would seem that Gordon Brown has decided that his "Government Of The Talents" must include a token representative of the followers of the Cult Of The Dead Paedophile. And the cultist he has chosen is Mr Shahid Malik, MP doe Dewsbury. Mr Malik has been elevated to the lofty heights of Overseas Development Minister, and aparently makes something of a habit of flying to and from the USA to attend and give talks on terrorism.

Personally I would have thought someone more closely associated with Sinn Fein, The DUP or Cymdeithas Yr Iaeth Gymraeg would be better qualified to speak on that subject. But maybe Gordy knows something about Mr Malik that makes him particularly suited to the task.

But it seems Mr Malik is unhappy at the way he is treated by his overseas hosts. Well, at least, according to those awfully correctly balanced people that run the BBC News he is. Because he's been there twice now and both times he was hauled out of the queue and searched for explosives. Something he says only he and other moslems have had to put up with.

What's your beef, Mr Malik ?

Are you unhappy that airtport staff treat you like a piece of shit ? I have news for you. Airport staff treat EVERYONE like shit. That's their job.

Or are you unhappy that AMERICAN airport staff treat Brits like shit ? Well, there is an easy answer there Mr Malik. Retaliate. Strip search every yank trying to get into Britain. Then they can discover for themselves how much we appreciate their making OUR country a target for those who harbour a vitriolic hatred of George Dubya and his policies. But for gods sake do it somewhere soundproof and out of sight. The thought of all that obese flesh being cavity searched makes me want to ... oh hell ..... huuugggghhhhhhieee.

Or are you unhappy that AMERICANS treat BRITISH GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS like shit ? Well, Mr Malik, I congratulate you on waking up and smelling the coffee. Now this might have something to do with Gordy refusing to put his head up George Bush's arse like Blair, or on the other hand it could have something to do with the fact that the Americans treat everyone like shit when they disagre with their politics. Ask anyone about a chap called Anthony Eden who thought he could wage a war in the Middle East without first kissing the US president's arse. He soon found out how the Special Relationship works. But that's nothing to how some heads and Ministers of Governments that don't dance to the US tune have fared. Lots of them end up dead. Think yourself lucky your head is still fitted where you were born with it.

Or maybe you're treated the way you are, Mr Malik, because you worship a guy whose writings are the basis of a "religion" that thinks it ok to bomb people to shreds for political means. And until you and your kind do more to stop that sort of thing, you DESERVE to be treated as if you are carrying out the will of Osama at every airport checkpoint. And if that means you walk uncomfortably onto the plane and have to sit on a sore arse all the way home, so much the better.

Wednesday, 24 October 2007

This Morning A Child Molestor Sits Behind Bars. Why Am I Not Celebrating ?

I'm a little pressed for time this morning so I thought I'd get the bare bones of this post up and come back later to fill in the blanks and the links and pictures.

What Happenned Yesterday?

What "bad news" did Gordon need hidden?

I shouldn't be thinking those things, but the fact is I am. And here's why.

A lifetime ago, when water companies were utilities, summers were long and hot, and sex was a new experience (for me, anyway), I remember a news story making headlines in a way that it wouldn't these days because it's all too familiar a tale. A girl of about eleven went to the corner shop for her mother and never came back. I have a suspicion from the time that she was sent off to the shop to buy her mum a packet of fags (an errand I myself was often sent on for my grandmother when I was eleven) but of course in today's tobacco-phobic times that snippet of information would have to be neatly censured from the public records. I remember the news of her body being found a few days later and I remember the trial and conviction of some chap or other a while later but these things blur together.

And later, much later, as a fully trained biochemist with friends and former work colleagues in the forensic science service I recalled the case for all the wrong reasons. The same sort of reasons one remembers a woman murdered at the roadside by a mad axeman and the lorry driver wrongly convicted of doing it because he had the same wierd blood group, the same reason one remembers the birmingham six sentenced for the terrorist activity of playing cards on the Dublin To Holyhead Ferry. A slight scientific cock-up. Or in this case cock-not-up. Or not firing, anyway.

Because the story broke that the man arrested for the stabbing and sexual assault of that little girl all those years ago was set free after sixteen years because finally, FINALLY, the courts accepted he hadn't done it, which of course he'd said all along.

How did they know this ? Well it was pretty rudimentary really. The little girls killer had left semen on her underwear. And the unfortunate chap thrown behind bars for this heinous crime by the mob baying for blood, who if I recall correctly wasn't exactly the brightest bulb in the electrical department, suffered from a medical condition that meant he weas sterile. So he was incapable of leaving any sperm anywhere. Poor bastard.

But of course the tale had a completely happy ending. Well, the lawyers who put him away no doubt continued to enjoy their elevated income and the lifestyle it brought, the lawyers who failed to defend him by asking the most obvious of questions "was this your sperm on these undergarments or not" no doubt continued to collect their pensions and I doubt the judge, jury or anyone else involved in the case was ever brought to book. Because that's one thing we don't do is it ? And as for the falsely accused ? Well he died two years later at the age of 44 so he wasn't going to be pressing his case for wrongful arrest and miscarriage of justice was he.

And so to this morning. Where trumpeted across the papers is the story that Blair's Wonderful DNA Gathering Big Brother State pulled some bloke over for a motoring offence, grabbed his DNA as a rsult, and then some 'cold case' squad working in a basement dungeon got lucky by crossmatching him to the underwear he left stained on the corpse all those years ago.

So why am I not cheering loudly in the streets hailing Blair as the guardian of all the good honest hard working decent people ? Because the good honest decent hard working father in me says I bloody well should be. But somehow I can't.

Soemthing within me says it's a pyrrhic victory.

Something tells me the 'Lets Do The ID Cards' lobby are celebrating this morning.

Something within me says a government led for ten years by a control freak, who handed the reins onto an even bigger control freak, just WONT be able to resist the temptation to use the fact that scientists will, within months, be growing DNA sequences to order in a test tube to "do An OJ bloody glove" job and plant artifically grown DNA on the underwear of someone murdered to order so that a Thorn in Gordon's Political Side can be silenced.

And somrthing within me says we ought to pause for a moment to remember the man cruelly wronged by the system all those years ago, who isn't around now to accept whatever grudging apology the people who put him away probably wouldn't bother offering anyway, who in my book is every bit as much the victim as the mother of that little girl who we saw yesterday walking into the court to finally see her daughter's killer put away.

And that's another thing. This bloke apparently assaulted another girl a year later, got hauled up for it, came out and when he had his collar felt recently was quoted as saying "I've Been Expecting This For Years". I suppose I ought to grab a photo of this bloke who is waking up behind bard this morning. Because I strongly suspect that in a few years he'll be transferred to Prescoed Open Prison, and will then be put up in a cosy little half way house just up the road from a couple of junior schools like all the other sex offenders in this neck of the woods.

Friday, 19 October 2007

"Wales' Only Ethnic AM" shaken by first hand experience of Moslem Political Dissatisfaction


It would appear Wales' only ethnic minority Assembly Member has been left shaken at his first-hand experience of the way his ethnic brethren express their dissatisfaction with their own politicians.

Asghar is of course well known in my neck of the woods for his bare-faced cheek in trying to make the Kuffar of the Caliphate Of Newportistan submit to his demand for free parking for his moslem chums outside their mosque on friday mornings whilst of course expecting the yellow peril to continue to penalise anyone so foolish as to try to park near St Woolos' Cathedral on a Sunday.

Asghar stood for the Assembly under the Daffodil of the Friends of The Cottage Burners And Road Sign Defacers Of Wales. Elected by the cosy little arangement that ensures no-hopers first past the post get a second bite of the cherry but only if they're in the Buggins' Turn Club, Asghar seems to have swung himself a little jolly to stand at Benazir Bhutto's side during her triumphal return to Pakistan after doing a cosy little deal of her own with Pakistan's military ruler, President Pervez Musharraf. Whether he was sitting in her armoured truck at the time of the terror attack that killed 130 is not reported.

My question is this: "what was he doing out there and who paid for him to go ?" I can't see any obvious reason for Wales to send a representative from its hot air shit pit to watch the triumphal return of a self exiled prime minister after having legal actions set aside, unless Rhodri and Ieuan feel the need to send someone to get first hand information on 'get out of jail free' cards. Can anyone enlighten me ?

UPDATE21-10-07: How nice of the BBC to edit the page after I'd borrowed it. Now the page contains details of the carnage and allows Mr Asghar to speak of his horror at being at the heart of it. "I never thought so much destruction would happen," said Mr Asghar, who was travelling in a vehicle that was not bullet-proof. "What I've been through I've never ever seen in my life - the body parts and dead people" he said. Which is strange given that he is himself a follower of islam and must therefore understand these people were only trying to bring about Mohammed's will.

But this still doesn't really answer the questions I want answered. Like who paid for him to go there, and what good they thought Mr Asghar could do out there. Or maybe, just maybe, they confused his membership and candidacy for the Friends Of The Cottage Burning Party Of Wales party was associated with this chap who had a novel idea for using dogs instead of humans as suicide bombers.

I suppose it's not a difficult mistake to make, after all.

Nice religion you have there, Mr Asghar.

Monday, 15 October 2007

France tries to finish what Maggie The Milk Snatcher Thatcher started


An interesting little leak, but Im not sure whose udders are being tweaked.

In this article the Daily Mail reveal a leaked proposal to deny us the right to drink fresh pasteurised milk on the grounds that the costs of refrigeration are a burden upon the planet.

Now the article caused such an outcry that DEFRA has been forced to publish a denial. Which naturally means it is true. Maybe the jerks thought they could bury the story on the day Ming The Merciless had to admit he was actually Ming The Boring Old Fart. However, don't they KNOW the lib dems stage-manage everything to hit the 6pm news slot ?

Where did this plan come from ? Well, I'll give you a hint. They don't like British Farmers, they executed their aristocracy a couple of hundred years ago, they use UHT milk 95% of the time, and they can't wait to usher asylum sekers onto lorries on their side of the channel tunnel.

Vive Le Pimpernel Rouge !

Sunday, 14 October 2007

Thou Shalt Not Put An Icon Of Christ On The Tea Room Wall



Now I wasn't going to bother commenting on this story because it has already been covered by many others. But I changed my mind after finding the video embedded above on the website of The Lone Voice. The video has clearly been edited a bit.

In essence an airport car park supervisor was sent home for several days when a moslem colleague complained to the management that he had deliberately attempted to provoke offence and outrage by placing an iconic picture of jesus christ on the wall of their tea room. After sending the chap home for several days the management saw this for what it was, yet another moslem outburst at the rejection of sharia law in britain, and reinstated the chap without blemish on his character.

Mind you, given the unorthodox methods used to recently deliver a month's supply of propane gas to glasgow airport, I would recommend denying access to the airport to any unshaven men driving jeep grand cherokees for a while.

I decided to comment on this incident after listening to the above video. In this, "Channel M News" reporter Beverley Walkden talks to Father Denis Mayer, of St Paul's RC Church, Hyde, about the incident. Their conversation goes like this:-

BW: "Was it" [the iconic picture] "offensive ?"

Fr DM: "I can well understand how a muslim would be offended by that because it is a very, very stong catholic statement"

BW "Should be people be able to express freely their faith?"

Fr DM: Well, I think the way to express your faith is how you live, not by hanging an image on the wall"

Now excuse me, but when I was indoctrinated into the christian belief system - which I, like dawkins, now reject - I was given to understand that a core part of that religion required adherence to the belief that the "son" of a carpenter - well that's what it said on his identity papers, although the "father" protestated to his death bed that he never touched the mother - lived and was put to death by the orders of a representative of the roman empire and that his execution was carried out in a manner reserved pretty much exclusively for the most base of criminals and for those who threatened the rule of rome, and that to the extreme annoyance of several of these people the swine refused to stay dead.

In contrast, The church of england as depicted in Jane Austen's novels was an organisation to which the landed gentry turned to provide employment for their younger sons. Eldest son inherited the estate, second son went into the church whose parish priesthoods were referred to repeatedly as "the living", for the income it provided, and the third son went into the army. God forbid then that it were ever necessary to actually believe in christ as saviour in order to take the salary.

I am given to understand that this attitude existed in reality and that is why one Mr Wesley took his soap box and stood in fields outside the parish boundaries (preaching INSIDE those boundaries without the authority and approval of the vicar being a serious offence) where he caused a religious revival.

If the Roman Catholic Church no longer defends the right of their flock to practice their tradition of displaying and venerating religious art then we have truly reached the point where the church has lost the plot.

Friday, 12 October 2007

Harry Potter vs. The Inaccessible Goddess


Here we go again with yet another instalment of "I couldn't make this up, no-one would believe me if I did". No sooner has Harry made "Voldy Go Mouldy" (a quote there to prove I HAVE endured the torture of the book) and got his leg over his childhood sweetheart, it seems Potter has his sights on the Hindu faithful. Or at least his creator and the lawyers paid by the company with the film and image rights have.



Any minute now the Hindu faithful will hold a "serious bash" to celebrate the Goddess Durga, the Inaccessible One apparently created as a beautiful warrior woman depicted above in a battle against a bull demon.

Well there's quite a festival on for celebation of this goddess. And the faithful have taken toi building a model Hogwarts and Hogwarts Express. And it seems Warner Brothers are a little hacked off because this goes against their guidelines for "reasonable use of the copyright imagery by non profit making bodies for small celebrations". So they're sending in the lawyers.

The ought to be careful. Because this goddess has more balls than the ones clearly displayed on the tiger she rides and the bull demon she defeats.

Thursday, 11 October 2007

Wales Millennium Centre - In the Red and Staying There

Ardent fans of the Doctor Who spinoff "Torchwood" will no doubt wonder why Captain Jack Harkness has failed to spot the most obvious alien presence on the planet, right next to his Team HQ. For anyone who wandered past the "Wales Millennium Centre" when it was being built (long after the millennium had passed) could not fail to notice the resemblance between the shell of the Wales Millennium Centre and a Stargate Goa'uld (or more likely Tok'Ra) Shuttlecraft.
Here's another view of the building, showing its famous motto in a language so dead no-one who walks past the building realises it actually says "THANKS FOR ALL THE DOSH TO BUILD THIS PLACE AND SCREW YOU, SUCKERS"

"Wales Millennium What" I hear you say - "Never Heard Of It". Well you should have. It cost £106 MILLION to build (you could have a decent cottage hospital for that sort of money) and it is in the red and hopelessly so. Yes this second biggest white elephant in Cardiff Bay is secure in the knoeledge that its borrowings have been guaranteed by the occupants of the biggest white elephant in town, the hot air powered shit pit where all the windbags of the welsh assembly sit, play sudoku on the PC's in the debating chamber and pontificate while the roof leaks on them.

What a difference a month makes.

Only last month The BBC were lauding the success of this "landmark arts venue" with glowing words of praise. This is what they said.

"The Wales Millennium Centre (WMC) has reached a 'landmark' £20m in ticket sales since it opened in Cardiff Bay nearly three years ago, officials say. When it opened in November 2004 there was some scepticism about whether the venue would meet its financial targets. But with over 1.5m visitors since, the centre is on track to meet its targets for the third year running. Meanwhile, two other city entertainment venues said they had sustained their ticket sales since WMC's arrival.

Bet Davies, advisor to the WMC, said when it had first opened there was 'some cynicism' that people would not travel to the venue, and it would only attract a local audience. But she said the £106m centre was now taking its place on the 'world stage'. However, month-on-month 79% of the audience were from south east Wales, with 10-11% travelling from west Wales, she said. About 9-10% were from 'across the border' with around 3% of the audience making the journey from north Wales.

WMC chief executive Judith Isherwood said the centre was now looking at 'restructuring and streamlining' in response to changes at the site."

But the article went on to stress that the New Theatre and the St Davids Hall had not suffered a downturn in ticket sales. Well I can understand the New Theatre. After all, while a load of highbrow opera buffs packed the Wales Millennium Centre for one night only to losten to the entire Wagner Ring Cycle, "Captain Jack Harkness" was soing unmentionable things to a beanstalk with a principal boy, all sponsored by a chocolate manufacturer. But the St Davids Hall ? A monstrosity which Prince Charles described as a carbuncle that was not so much constructed as allowed to congeal in the midst of an area of architectural delight.

But what's this I see now.

A month after such glowing praise was handed out, accountants predict financial ruin. as an "unpublished review" (that'll be a leaked report Rhodri and his Cottage Burning Assistant were hoping to bury then) says the £106m arts venue has debts of £13.5m and is predicted to sustain considerable losses in future years. In its annual accounts for 2006, which were filed on Tuesday, WMC's auditors KPMG say "considerable uncertainty" in achieving a settlement with the assembly government "may cast significant doubt about the group's ability to continue as a going concern." Culture Minister Rhodri Glyn Thomas says he cannot give an interview to BBC Wales because of commercial confidentiality. WMC chairman Lord Rowe-Beddoe is to meet the culture minister next Tuesday and the centre hopes that the assembly government will repay the £13.5m loan and increase its subsidy to between £3m and £4m a year.

The truth is hardly anyone bothers to hike their way across from West Wales for two hours to see anything in this place and only a similarly paltry number pay the £5 entry tax at the severn bridge to get here from Briostol followed by another £10 in highway robbery fees to park in Cardiff.

But for a centre dedicated to all things Welsh, what a laugh it is to me to see three Bristolians visit the place for every North Walian.

Well what a surprise that is.

Election Fraudster Jailed - Well Done Manchester Police


It's not that often I have a good word to say about the way our police force is run these days, and let's be honest, when you read that North Wales' very own clown in blue wants to decriminalise all drugs so his men can concentrate on the only real criminals in this country - motorists - one would be tempted to wonder if there was anthing good one could say.

But today I stand in wonderment and admiration of Greater Manchester Police for their action in restoring a tiny bit of credibility to the way this country is run. Why so ? Because a 19 year old who thought he could screw the system and impersonate another man at the polling booth has been brought to book, and recently started a stint of six weeks behind bars.


Adeel Hanif (born 23/02/88) of Villa Road in Oldham pleaded guilty to the offence at Minshull Street Crown Court on 18 September 2007. He was sentenced on Tuesday 9 October 2007.

On 4 May 2006 polling stations throughout Oldham officially opened for members of the public to vote in the Local Council Elections. At 9.30pm that evening officers were informed that a member of the public had turned up at a polling station at Coppice Junior School in the Medlock Vale Ward and had been unable to vote as his vote had already been used. Police later went to the Elections Office and seized the tendered ballot list for that particular ward, before obtaining a court order to seize all ballot papers and stubs. Officers took the victim's fingerprints and compared them to those found on the ballot paper in his name. They did not match.

The defendant's fingerprints were found on the ballot paper and he was later summonsed to court on suspicion of election impersonation.

A apokeman for Greater Manchester police went on to say that the force took this sort of thing very seriously and hoped this outcome would act as a deterrent to anyone else thinking of carrying out a similar act.

Now I am sure it cost an absolute fortune in police time and resources to investigate this allegation, charge this defendant and bring the case to its conclusion. But I say it was worth every penny. For two reasons.

First, the way my own postal vote against the establishment of a joke parliament and hot air shit pit in Cardiff Bay was interfered with, and the way my complaint about that was ignored by everyone, politician and policeman, to whom I complained, has left me with a profound belief that the cottage burning party of wales will do ANYTHING to get their snouts in the trough and no-one will do anything about it, so it is pleasing to see there are some parts of this united kingdom of ours where interfering with an election is seen as an offence warranting imprisonment.

Second, because I cannot imagine how many men and women have struggled, fought, and died to give us the right to walk into a polling station and vote for who we want to run our lives. In a United Kingdom governed by The Mother Of Parliaments, there can be no baser act than to walk into a polling booth with the express intent of stealing another man's vote. It is worse than murder. It is worse than rape. It is an act that requires the most complete contempt of the very essence of what this country is and what it stands for.

The press reports do not say for whom Mr Hanif cast the vote he stole. I have checked the oldham poll results and I found a Labour Party Candidate was elected there by 1050-odd people, giving them a majority of less than 20 votes over a Liberal Democrat with a most islamic sounding name.

The third placed candidate was standing for the BNP and polled around 500 votes, the fourth placed candidate stood for the Green Party and polled 203 votes, and the Tories, with another most islamically named candidate cpould only manage a poor last place three votes behind the greens.

Whether this piece of scum had friends who weren't caught who managed to swing the election the way it went, or whether their plot was thwarted, I cannot say. However I wonder how "individual" an act this was, and how much the fact that only 30-odd per cent of the electorate bothered to turn out was a factor this chap and any fellow fraudsters counted upon can only be imagined.

However, I think that three months behind bars (six weeks in reality) is far too lenient a punishment. Hanging for treason sounds mush more appropriate.

Tuesday, 9 October 2007

Selling Books can seriously damage your health

Selling books is a dodgy business these days, as this chap found out the hard way. Although there seem to be several TechoRati links picking up the story, I like the version I found on an Italian site advertising Asian News in English.

Although what a chap with a name like "Arieh Cohen" is doing writing artlcles for an italian website advertising Asian News beats me.

Here's the details.

Gaza (AsiaNews) – A Palestinian protestant missionary was killed yesterday. He went missing Saturday October 6th in the afternoon and his body was found yesterday in a city street, tortured and with to bullet wounds to the head. Authorities from Shifa hospital confirmed that his body carried diverse knife wounds.

Rami Khader Ayyad, 32, was the director of the only Christian bookshop in Gaza, linked to the protestant organisation of the Palestinian Bible society. Ayyad had received death threats for his missionary work in spreading the Gospel. Last April his bookshop had been burnt during a campaign against “vice” launched by the group “the sword of Islam”.

Simon Azazian, spokesperson for the Bible Society in Jerusalem declared that Ayyad was killed for “his Christian faith”. Azazian confirms that October 5th, Ayyad had been followed by a car without registration plates. Saturday afternoon, as he closed his shop, he was kidnapped by a group of unknown men. Ayyad then phoned his family – his wife and two children – saying that he would be late home. His body was found lifeless the next day.

The Popular Front for the Liberation of Palestine, immediately issued a statement calling the killing “a desperate attempt to sabotage the good social relations in Palestinian society and the friendly relations between Christian and Muslims”.

Hamas authorities, who manage security in Gaza, have promised to punish “without pity” the authors of the crime who, “compromise the security and stability of our people”.

In Gaza there are around 3,200 Christians – Greek Orthodox, Catholic and protestant – compared to a Muslim population of circa 1.5 million. Relations between the two communities, by and large are calm, united by the same ethnic roots. The rising Islamic fundamentalism in Gaza and in the Palestinian world is however creating increasing incidents between the two. During the Hamas takeover, vandals ransacked a Catholic convent and an adjacent Rosary Sisters school, breakingcrosses and smashing the face of a ceramic Jesus. No one claimed responsibility, and Hamas vehemently denied involvement.

Even during the crises created by the Muhammad cartoon affair the Catholic Church in Gaza was besieged forcing an immediate police intervention.

Ayyad was a Protestant Baptist, well known for his courage. Often he was criticised by yellow Christians for his work which they considered too visible and explicit, linked to foreign Protestants. Majority of the Christians in fact prefer keeping a low profile to avoid any difficulties or accusations linked to proselytism.

Questioned by AsiaNews, Fr. David Maria Jaeger, an Israel Franciscan in the Holy Land said: “Ayyad was an intrepid Christian, a glory for the entire community of believers in Christ who live in His homeland. The fact that he belonged to the Protestant community underlines that what unites us outstrips what divides us. And its not the first time in the Region that the protestant evangelicals enlighten us and teach us to have faith in Christ, free from conditioning, free from fear and a presumptuous “prudence”, which all too often burden so many of us Christians”.

Fr. Jaeger calls Rami Ayyad “a martyr”. “From the proto-martyr Stephan to today, the Church in the Holy Land has been enriched by the witness of so many martyrs. We can only place our hope in the ancient and comforting certainty that the blood of the martyrs is the seed of Christians”.

Friday, 5 October 2007

Smoking Ban and White Van Man


We all know what the term white van man means, right. And if you don't like how wikipedia defines it (a stereotype, a usually pejorative term used in the United Kingdom to describe aggressive, thoughtless drivers of light commercial vehicles) then go get a wikipedia account and take it up with them.

I've noticed something over the past couple of months. They're getting worse. And so are their bigger relatives in 44 tonne artics.
Every afternoon when I leave the office after the 8-4 shift I end up trying to dodge a 30- to 40-odd tonne aggregates lorry as it thunders down the slip road of junction 26, forcing anything on the roundabout to swerve as it drives straight onto the roundabout with no concern for any other motorist, barges through the queued traffic on the roundabout to make a new lane at the lights, takes off from them when they change like an XR3 driven by a boy racer, hurtles round the roundabout on half its wheels, charges down the malpas road bus lane at sixty, barges back into the traffic, runs the red at the harlequin, whips round the roundabout onto the heidenheim drive up ramp, charges along that road at speeds my car can't match, barges its way onto the j25a slip, drives along that on the lane blocked off with chevrons, barges its way into the caerleon road exit ramp, throws itself into the exit to caerleon and drives up that road in the middle of the cariageway to deter oncoming traffic from getting in its way as it roars up the 30 road at 50.
Yesterday a beat up white transit belching black smoke from a sawn off exhaust half way down the chassis did almost the same. Every time someone got in his way he would wave his fist bat them out of the drivers window.
A month or two ago my wife was driving her Honda through a 50mph single carriageway speed camera ridden set of roadworks on the M4 just west of cardiff in pitch black because any motorway lamps there once might have been were removed for the carriageway widening. A 44 tone GE artic lorry came up her arse flashing his lights trying to make her go faster through the speed cameras (she was already doing 51 and fifty yards in front of her were three cars so she couldn't go anywhere even if she put her foot down). Yet this didn't stop fsckwit in the truck from trying to ram us off the road (I consider that when he's up your arse so close that people in the back seat of our car cant read the number plate through our back window and then he puts his foot down in bursts closing what little gap remains he's trying to ram - what do you think).

And these are ****NOT**** isolated incidents they are merely the worst three that have happenned. Admittedly many of those badly behaved artics have funny looking number plates so maybe they've been driving all night from latvia or something. But I have spent the last seventeen years doing about 30,000 miles a year around the country as an IT consultant. I was a road warrior before cool brittania inmvented the term.

And I say up and down the roads in cities and across rural wales commercial drivers and white van men are driving faster, driving more aggressively, barging their way onto roundabouts, barging their way across junctions and shooting traffic lights to a degree that I have never, ever seen before. Why is this ? Well I've just had a moment of inspiration.

My former boss in the 80's was a smoker who got irritable as shit every time he tried to give up (and come on guys I live in a house with wife and two daughters i ***KNOW*** what irritable means when they all get PMT at the same time I run for cover) so is it just possible THE SMOKING BAN preventing these people from lighting up is responsible for this ?

Did ANYONE give a fsck about road safety when they imposed this ban on lighting up in the cab ? No of course not. How long before someone dies as a result of this increased irritability behind the wheel caused by political correctness gone mad ?

Tuesday, 2 October 2007

CADW protest at plans to bulldoze coal spoil heap

A few months ago I commented on a story that a reopened drift mine would have to recruit miners from the EU as no mining skills remained in the indigenous population as a result of the almost complete obliteration of the industry by Margaret Thatcher.

I wrote that blog only too aware that the end of that industry brought damnation and despair to its once-proud employees, but also brought benefits for those who weathered the storm. One poster commented that just up the road from here, a hill overlooking three mining towns provided a view of which might have been the deepest levels of hell with dust, smoke, steam and sulphurous fumes belched into the air.

And the end of this industry means at least this list of lives lost underground cannot grow as it once did. No longer do three generations of women live in perpetual fear and dread of the pit-head hooter being sounded in mid-shift, the death-knell for grandfathers, fathers, husbands, sons, and grandsons whose eyes would not see the light of day again.

And of course there is the other death toll. The many who died in sunlight or moonlight, but died because their bodies were ruined through working in the industry or living with it. And then there were the innocents whose lives were snuffed out in an instant by the consequences of the greed of those running the industry not caring where and how they left the spoil ripped from the underworld.

I was nine at the time Spoil Heap Number Seven wiped almost all the children off the face of the village of Aberfan. The junior school I went to was about the same size. So when years later the Welsh Development Agency invited me to consider moving my business onto land near Ebbw Vale they had "reclaimed" from this industry you can imagine why I replied "No Thanks, I want my office to stay where it is and not slide into the valley along with the spoil heaps I still do not believe you know how to tame"

And so it os with disbelief that I read that CADW (affectionately known to those who worked there as "Chaos And Disaster - Wales" for its inability to sort out a piss-up in a brewery) are up in arms over plans to bulldoze a wrexham coal tip

The local council want to bulldoze this spoil heap and sell off the material it contains as building hardcore. But the fools in this welsh quango set up to oversee and 'keep' the genuine historic monuments of this once-proud principality are up in arms at this desecration of a piece of our industrial heritage.

Let me give you a bit of advice, CADW (a welsh word meaning "keep" or "to keep"). Some things are worth keeping. Like the Newport Ship. Or the castles that stand as monuments to when the welsh were kept in their place.

Other things are best bulldozed.

PS. Guess what. Cadw WON the damn court case. Enjoy the slag heap, guys.

Monday, 1 October 2007

Trevor Phillips demands we rewrite history of the Spanish Armada

Another in my series "By odin's beard I could not make this up". We all know that History is written by the Winning Side. However, it is first necessary for the war to be won. And on this one the Multiculturalist Enrichment Burkha Enforcing Back Slappers have NO chance.

It seems that well known, much loved, fair minded egalitarian chappie Trevor Phillips is mouthing off again. And this time he wants history rewritten. The history of the way we DEFEATED THE SPANISH ARMADA. It seems he requires us to acknowledge the part played by the Moslems in delaying the armada's progress without which we would have been overrun by the Inquisitors.

Now I'm as happy as anyone to see history rewritten to more closely reflect the truth. I jump for joy every time Tony Robinson's pals dig up someone's garden and prove from the remains of some mediaeval sewer outpourings that what I was taught as the undeniable truth when I did my O Levels was all a load of tosh. And living where I do I'm particularly proud of the discovery of our own little bit of maritime history. But I'm far more proud of the way we gave the councillors who wanted to bury it in concrete so as to continue building their mausoleum and to hell with the archaeologists a damn good stuffing. (Oh yeah check out that link and wonder at the putrid lighting that we can't have any more as it costs too much to leave on).

But back to the point now I think. FACT NUMBER ONE: The Spanish Armada largely overshot their planned attack point. FACT NUMBER TWO: They were then driven the length of the english channel and into the North Sea by a mixture of tides, winds and currents. FACT NUMBER THREE: Forced to round the northern tip of scotland to attempt their return voyage, their mission a failure and with the english navy in hot pursuit, many of the ships foundered and sent their religious invaders to Davy Jones' locker without their ever getting a chance to incant a papal mass.

And if you want to see these facts yourself go check out the National Geographic Channel. That's where I last saw the documentary footage that rewrote the history of this particular episode. And not a turk in sight.

So in a way I agree with trevor phillips. We do need to rewrite history. We need to show him the evidence that when a robust naval presence protects our home ports and patrols our territorial waters to keep out alien religious influence, the would-be invaders get an unmarked grave on the sea bed.

Now if only our Navy had not been reduced to a pale shadow of its former self and been sent packing half way round the world to fight someone else's war we'd be able to lay on a demonstration.

More Coffee And Biscuits, Imam Doji-Al-Shifti Sir ?

Ladies and Gentlemen, Pray silence for the latest instalment in an occasional series entitled "By Odin's Beard, I could not make this up"

A GOVERNMENT minister believes that the answer to furthering the integration of the Muslim community into wider British society could be for them to share more coffee and biscuits with their white neighbours.

John Denham, the Secretary of State for Innovation, Universities and Skills was addressing a meeting in Bournemouth organised by the Fabian Society on citizenship and integration.

Zareen Roohi Ahmed of the British Muslim Forum told the meeting that the problems often stemmed from a "massive Eurocentric" view and said she hoped that the government would be pushing for a "less Eurocentric culture".

She explained: "Asians would say that the main barrier is a lack of trust, mistrust among young Asians and past supporters of the Labour Party who are feeling let down. In the recent past Labour has been more Islamaphobic than most of the other political parties.

"Indeed in Dudley, in the West Midlands where I was born Labour seems uncomfortable with Muslims and it recently abandoned its support to support the BNP instead. It has left that community feeling dejected."

Dejected ? DEJECTED !! Now I've heard everything.

Oh, by the way, I think any islamists thinking of peaceably following those ideas above ought to stay away from those particular biscuits I depict above. I'm not at all sure they're kosher (or whatever term you use for 'bled out onto over the pavement whilst facing mecca').

Oh yeah. My humble apologies to Ali Jihadi (most prophetic). My Norse friends requisitioned (most peacefully, in a wooden crate) your imam for this post's title. I promise to have him back in your mosque in time for friday prayers. Shall we say two camels for the rental fee ? Tell you what I'll throw in a copy of "By Odin's Beard" the most celebrated discourse on the ethics and psychology of how one should properly go about "Going A Viking" including the special illustrated section on how wading through cold seawater improves the sperm count so necessary for those All-Night raids. Should go down a bundle on your bookshelves.

The Hitch-Hikers Guide to Entering Britain. Use Blair's BMW

I couldn't make it up. This story had me rolling on the floor laughing. Until I realised whose money had been used to buy the thing - yours and mine.

It seems our recently departed still-dissembling previous leader of the labour party and part-time prime minister of the united kingdom was supposed to take delivery of a bullet-proof armour plated BMW. Hey Gordy I wonder what its CO2 emissions are ?

It seems however that the vehicle has gone back to the manufacturer as 'compromised goods'. Because when the transporter bringing the car into this country was opened inside a secure police compound, four people the telegraph describe as "asylum seekers" were found inside the container with the luxury car.

I will leave aside the outrageous behaviour of the daily telegraph by tarring and feathering those forced to flee their homeland through fear of death and persecution and shoving them in the same barrel as those who seek illegal entry to this country to make a fast buck in the hope that they will get leave to remain after a decade of living as part of an underclass.

I will merely ask how what was supposed to be one of the most secure vehicle imports into this country found itself the recipient of unwelcome attention from economic migrants in northern france.

Jeremy Hardy takes another pop at the BNP's supporters

You would be forgiven for thinking that Jeremy Hardy would have realised it's not a good idea to take a pop at the supporters of British Political Parties.

The leaders, maybe. Those who crave power and manipulate the electoral process to ensure that elections are decided on the whim of perhaps 100,000 people deserve everything they get.

But just as Norman Tebbitt inherited the whirlwind after his spitting image puppet was seen crouching behind boxes in a windowed room, whittling down the unemployment queues by taking careful aim with an ancient Lee Enfield, Jeremy Hardy found to his alarm it was not such a good idea as he first thought to suggest a final solution to the "BNP Supporters Problem".

But has Mr Hardy really learned his lesson ?

Because those of you who might have listened to Eddie Mayer's "4 At 40" last night would have heard Mr Hardy reflect on the admonishments handed down to him. "Repentant" wasn't a word I'd use to describe what he said.

If you're quick you can catch it for yourself on Radio 4's "Listen Again". The passage in question occurs z minutes y seconds into their streamed programme that lasts 1 hour 44 minutes. Or if you wait until tomorrow I'll put a link to an edited Ogg Vorbis Rip here. I'm grabbing and saving the stream as evidence for counsel for the prosecution as we speak.

Post Script

And here we go, people. Mr Hardy is introduced at 59 minutes into the broadcast by Eddie Mayer. He eaxes lyrical about various things, takes a pop at Desert Island Discs on the grounds that it's not real. They are not stranded on a desert island. In order to be on this program you need to be famous, and therefore if they were stuck there, having to make a palm leaf shelter for the night THEY WOULD BE MISSED. Unlike Mr Hardy I suspect. And at 1hr 3 minutes 21 seconds he says

And I've had complaints. Tons of them. Hundreds of complaints about blasphemy, and yet not one of them from God. I've had complaints from the British National Party. Why are they listening to comedy when their movement has its origins in Germany ? Humour's not going to be their thing, is it ? What do they find to like on Radio 4 ? It's British, but not that sort of British. It's mischievious, gleeful, open minded, eccentric, beguiling, infuriating. Foreigners find it bizarre, but not alienating, not exclusive. It makes them like us.


He then diverts to take down those who say Radio 4 is middle class and middle aged by pointing out Humphrey Littleton is neither, and as a jazz legend, can't be considered "white" can he.

Tell you what. Go listen for yourself from here. It's a 1MB mp3 file.